while having a heart to heart talk just before logistics paper,
ruiting talked about the art of flying a kite.

if you pull the string too hard,
it will break away.

if you let loose too fast,
it will come spiralling down.

and so, once you learn the skill of when to pull and when to let go,

then that is when you will see it fly.

no more.

words have left me.
i cant think of the right words to say.

what now?
what am i supposed to do?

rights.
i've been awoken by a call from my mother to close the windows should it rain just now at 8.48am.
2 hours after finally falling asleep at around 6 plus in the morning.

i give up trying to get any more sleep.
why do i always blog during exam period?
why is it that my thoughts only come at this time.
studying = thinking too too much; beyond the lecture notes?

anyway,
i'm here to offically declare that jolene is going to focus on mugging in the last 2 days before MST starts.
my sudden motivation to focus is so compelling that i have to blog it out!
i'm glad my determination finally came.
i'm grateful to the fact that i'm able to pick myself up fast enough.
YES. no more drifting away in other-than-lecture-notes thoughts!

GAMBATTE to those chiong-ing too!

hello, i'm awake now, not because i'm mugging,
but because there's just a lot of things to reflect about.
i'm getting cold feet and fast, irregular heartbeat.
so much thoughts flying in my head.

this is not a good time to be distracted.
i am very determined to settle this situation once and for all.
no more dragging it. i'm waiting for the verdict.
i dont want anymore meaningless attempts.

it's soon to be 5am. i'm still too agitated to sleep.
i'm wasting very very precious resting hours blogging.
this MST is going to be a killer.
6 papers in 5 days.
yet so many modules i have yet to revise.

sigh. nothing else to blog.
maybe i'll just use my notes as an attempt to comfort myself and make me sleepier.
so little hours before daybreak.
i thought i had just came home from dinner.
and now it's soon to be breakfast.

time is passing way too fast...
way, wayyy too fast for me to comprehend.

"okay, time to study..."
picks up her notes and starts reading...
... shuts her eyelids for a break... and...
"EH? SO LATE already?! when did i fall asleep?!"

lol. okok. i tried to study -.-"
so many attempts. but none showed success; all proved futile.

i need to study.
pick up the slack.
i have to do better than this - playing itouch, sleeping, being late for class.
what i've been doing for the past 4 weeks was a waste of time.
i dont want to regret not having fought harder.
stop going through the motion jolene!
jolene shall get her motivation back :D

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains - Preview: Season Finale :D :D :D

Jay Chou - 烟花易冷

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